QBQ - 5 Consequences of Victim Thinking
Posted by: John G. Miller
Have you heard something like, “It’s better to give someone a hand up than a handout”? Well, contrary to societal opinion, it’s not a mean or cruel statement. It’s wisdom, because it strikes at the heart of human nature.
Sure, there are times to give freely to people in need because we’ve been so blessed. I believe we’re called do so and I bet you do just that.
But, when I put my hand out—feeling entitled, deserving, and play the victim—there are clear consequences:
1. I become lazy
2. I get angry
3. I fail to contribute
4. I don’t serve
5. I stop learning
Let’s look at these briefly.
I become lazy
If I am handed stuff, why sweat, labor, and toil? Even though we were created to create and designed to work, any person given all he or she needs will find the path of doing nothing an easy one to tread. I simply become lazy.
I get angry
When I believe I’m entitled and then don’t get “what I deserve,” my thoughts are, Hey, not fair! and Why would they do this to me!? And because thoughts drive feelings, the output can only be one thing: Now I’m mad! Anger is generally an unhealthy place to be, serving none of us well.
I fail to contribute
There’s not a “motivational speaker” who hasn’t said, “What goes around comes around!” and “To get you must first give!” Well, no matter your view of these sweaty people on the platform, they’re right. It’s just the way the world works. It’s forever true: we reap what we sow. Truly, when my hand is out, I’m not using it, nor my feet, energy, or talent to add value to anyone else’s life. Fail!
I don’t serve
This sounds like contribution, but it comes before. Contribution is the result; service is the act. The act of serving feeds our soul, ignites our spirit, and creates joy—in us. When engaged in victim thinking, there’s about zero chance I’ll be serving and thus contributing to anyone—not even myself.
I stop learning
If I am lost in the forest, have never been a Boy Scout and want to survive, I would have to learn and learn fast! There would be no time for the traps victim thinking leads to: complaining, blaming, and procrastinating. I would work—intensely—to find food, water, and shelter. I may lack the skills, but the desire to learn would envelope me. If you hand me all that I need to make it, I would learn nothing.
So there you go—five consequences of playing victim.
Posted on 07/25/2016 at 06:00 AM
"Everyone communicates, few connect. We will show you how to connect and make an impact through your speeches and presentations."
Want to know the secret to getting anything you want in your professional and personal life? Communication. Communication is the key that unlocks the door to effectively influencing others. Whether you are leading a team of people in your company, running a business, negotiating a contract, or seeking buy-in from others, if you know how to communicate, you will be much more successful than those who do not. I can help you master the art of communication so you can connect and engage with others at every level.
The Maxwell Method of Speaking
Participating in the Maxwell Speaker Club is the next best thing to being trained by John Maxwell himself. Each week, we will watch and extract lessons from John’s live presentations and speeches. As your facilitator, I will guide you through practical exercises to help you master your communication. You will experience the same quality instruction used by John and Speaker Trainer, Roddy Galbraith, to train speakers all over the world through the John Maxwell Team. Join the speakers club that was created for leaders like you!
Want to improve your speaking skills? Learn from a master of communication, John C. Maxwell. This half-day workshop will be a powerful experiential speaker training workshop, covering topics such as:
• The art and practice of developing stories
• How to connect with your audience and hold their attention
• How to overcome the fear of speaking in public
• Developing your own style of communication
• Crafting your content for the most effective presentation
Upon completion of this training, participants will receive a certificate.
Whether you are making a 15-minute presentation or an hour-long keynote, your ability to connect and communicate will be essential to effectively getting the audience to take action and move forward. In this presentation, we will discuss the critical keys to success when it comes to influencing and impacting people. We will cover:
• The speaking skills essential for every leader.
• How to connect with others and keep them engaged.
• The power of stories - even in the most technical presentations.
• Why it is important for you as a leader to continue to develop your speaking skills.